How to de-escalate or regulate in 1 minute

· Trauma Parenting
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Foster parents become experts at de-escalation. We spend hours and hours in therapy and talking to medical experts and professionals. It's critical we have these skills, because escalations and a deregulated child can be very dangerous.

So here is a starting point for you. You will find what works for the child, but it's important to note, something that works today, may not work tomorrow. So I recommend compiling a LONG list of tools to use. It will become more natural over time, but at the beginning, it can feel overwhelming. And if it's overwhelming for you, it is likely 100 times more overwhelming for the child. 😩

Experts will say, it's best to figure out the TRIGGER or reason why the child got upset, so that you can prevent the problem. Which is right, and great advice....

...But if you are like me, you may roll your eyes 🙄 a little at this advice. Sometimes the trigger is the county worker coming to visit, a call with family, going to bed or other self care tasks. These are things that we can't control or remove from the child's life. I wish I could say there is a magical cure for this, but there isn't. We found that having a therapeutic team was life-changing, but every situation and family is different.

 Here is a video where I show you some of this live: